Relationship OCD (ROCD) Therapy in Chicago

Support for Intrusive Thoughts About Relationships

If you’re struggling with intrusive thoughts about relationships, constant doubt about your partner, or an urge to repeatedly seek reassurance, you’re not alone—and you’re not broken. For many students and young adults, these experiences are part of Relationship OCD (ROCD), a subtype of obsessive-compulsive disorder that targets relationships, attachment, and certainty.

At Chicago Counseling Center, we provide evidence-based OCD therapy in Chicago, helping clients learn how to respond differently to intrusive thoughts—without needing to “figure out” their relationship first.

Submit a schedule form to connect with our team at Chicago Counseling Center.

What Is Relationship OCD (ROCD)?

Relationship OCD (ROCD) is a form of OCD where obsessions focus on romantic relationships rather than external dangers. These thoughts are unwanted, repetitive, and highly distressing.

Common ROCD experiences include:

  • “What if I don’t really love my partner?”

  • “What if I’m settling or missing something better?”

  • “Shouldn’t this feel more certain?”

  • “Why am I noticing other people?”

What makes ROCD different from normal relationship doubt:
It’s how consuming the thoughts become—and the compulsive behaviors used to try to relieve anxiety.

Intrusive Thoughts About Relationships vs. Reality

From a cognitive-behavioral perspective, intrusive thoughts are not signals or truths. They are automatic mental events that happen to everyone. In OCD, the brain treats uncertainty as danger and demands certainty before allowing peace.

The result:

  • Mental checking of feelings

  • Constant analysis of attraction or “rightness”

  • Comparison to others or past relationships

  • Difficulty staying present or emotionally connected

Having intrusive thoughts about relationships does not mean your relationship is wrong. It means your nervous system is stuck in a fear-based loop.

When Reassurance Seeking OCD Patterns Take Over

Many people with ROCD turn to reassurance for relief:

  • Asking friends or family for opinions

  • Checking online forums or quizzes

  • Repeatedly asking a partner, “Are we okay?”

Why reassurance backfires:

  • Works briefly—then anxiety returns stronger

  • Strengthens the OCD cycle instead of resolving it

This is why reassurance seeking OCD patterns are a key focus of effective treatment.

Evidence-Based Therapy for Relationship OCD

The gold-standard treatment for ROCD is Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP), often combined with CBT strategies.

ERP for Relationship OCD helps you:

  • Learn how to sit with uncertainty without reacting

  • Reduce mental checking and reassurance behaviors

  • Build trust in your ability to tolerate discomfort

  • Reconnect with values rather than fear

ERP does not involve forcing decisions about staying or leaving a relationship. Instead, it helps you change how you respond to thoughts and anxiety—so OCD has less control.

Learn more about our approach and services here.

Who We Help

Our ROCD therapy services are designed for:

  • College students and graduate students

  • Young adults navigating dating or commitment

  • Individuals with perfectionism, anxiety, or low mood alongside OCD

  • Clients seeking structured, evidence-based care

Treatment is individualized, collaborative, and paced with care.

If you're ready to explore your therapy options, our FAQ page can provide further insights into what might work best for you.

What to Expect When You Start

We follow a client-first intake process:

  1. Start with a secure consultation form

  2. Meet with a therapist trained in OCD and ERP

  3. Clarify symptoms, goals, and next steps together

You don’t need to “prove” anything or have everything figured out before starting.

Frequently Asked Questions

Are intrusive thoughts about my partner normal?
Yes. The difference with ROCD is the intensity, frequency, and urge to resolve the thoughts through compulsions.

How is ROCD different from normal relationship doubt?
ROCD causes significant distress and interferes with daily life, focus, or emotional connection.

Do you offer ERP for relationship OCD in Chicago?
Yes. Our clinicians provide ERP-based OCD therapy tailored to relationship-focused obsessions.

Can ROCD be treated without involving my partner?
Often, yes. Treatment typically focuses on your relationship with thoughts and anxiety—not changing your partner.

Take the Next Step

If relationship OCD is affecting your peace, focus, or ability to enjoy connection, support is available.

Get Started Today: Submit a secure form to our team here.

Services available in-person in Chicago and via telehealth throughout Illinois.

References

  • Abramowitz, J. S., McKay, D., & Taylor, S. (2009). Clinical handbook of obsessive-compulsive disorder and related problems. Johns Hopkins University Press.

  • Dorozynski, C., & Szechtman, H. (2021). Obsessive–compulsive disorder and uncertainty. Journal of Anxiety Disorders, 78, 102358.

  • International OCD Foundation. (2023). Relationship OCD.

Chicago Counseling Center

Chicago Counseling Center provides compassionate, evidence-based therapy for individuals navigating OCD, anxiety, intrusive thoughts, perfectionism, and related concerns. Based in Chicago, IL, our team is dedicated to helping clients find clarity, confidence, and lasting relief through personalized care.

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